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Diary Of Life

It was a cold night of December 2007. It felt more cold than all other days. She could not understand what was happening anymore. The doctor's report had brought her very active life to a sudden stop. How could this be she wondered. She felt fine. She had no aches. She had just gone for a routine check up. And now she had stage two breast cancer.

She thought about her two adorable children. She had done everything for them. They looked up to her. They were her life. She did not want to close her eyes lest she died in her sleep and leave them. She forced a smile now and again. She did not want to alarm them. The elder one was quite inquisitive and he would have smelled a rat a mile away.

After tucking them in their beds. She closed the door to her bedroom behind her it was time for some serious talk with God.

"Oh Lord!" she said. "I have seen you work things out before for me. You have given me the wisdom to nature and bring up this children in your fear. You have continually provided for us we have never lucked. You have given me a good job that we can afford a roof on top of our heads. One thing i ask of you Lord is that you give me grace to handle this situation. That Lord you take away this cup from me. And with this four walls as a witness i promise that if you heal me. I will commit the rest of my life wholly to you."

As she lay down on her bed flashes of every good and bad scenario flashed before her very own eyes. Tears dripping down her cheeks and wetting and soaking her pillow. The thought of death now inevitable. How does she handle this? She wondered. Who does she share with? Where does she start seeking medication? How much will it cost her? She felt sad and sorry for the people she felt she would be living behind. And this made her sob the more.

She only read about this stories on the newspapers. And watched them on TV. How do this people handle this things she wondered.

The light from outside started coming through the drapes into the dark room in which she lay on her bed. She checked at the alarm clock on her dresser table. It was just a few minutes to the time the alarm goes off. She hadn't slept a wink. Her eyes felt puffy and swollen.

  ....To Be Continued....


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